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How to Keep God First in Your Marriage

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You and your spouse will come to realize that your to-do lists are not remotely as dire, and the precedence of your everyday tasks not as pressing as your need to seek Him in your marriage, together.


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Pick up the kids after baseball practice.
Fix the fence outside.
Finish up the latest project at work.
Make reservations at the new sushi restaurant in town.
Clean out the hallway closet.
Pay the electricity bill before Friday.

Does that look like your mental to-do list? Mine sure is long, too. Life is undoubtedly busy in different ways for everyone. To-do lists are created, and seemingly never completed, new commitments are made in and out of the office, and people continue on the fast-paced path of life. However, there must come a point, sooner rather than later, when married couples must slow down and realize how to keep their marriage strong, and this has nothing to do with making reservations at the new restaurant in town. Contrary to popular belief, a strong marriage is not built on a person’s successful career or wealth or well-scheduled lives. A strong, healthy, Christ-based marriage is when two people seek God, together, and keep Him number one in their relationship, which is the ultimate way to thrive together as one.

How to Keep God First in Your Marriage

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Acknowledging God as first in your life is not enough in attaining and maintaining a Biblical marriage. Sure, you may wholeheartedly believe that God is the single most important force in your life, and sure, you may read your Bible here and there; however, the way you excitedly seek a promotion at work or enthusiastically strive for your children to shine in life is the same way couples should eagerly focus on Jesus. Take the focus off of your to-do lists and life’s earthly priorities and seek Him through His Word, together, as a couple. You will experiences peace, love, stability and understanding that only He can provide.

The focus should be taken off of yourself and your spouse and redirected, first, to God and what He wants for your marriage

Contrary to what many couples may believe, marriage is not solely about a husband and a wife. Well, marriage is about a husband and wife, but in God’s eyes, the focus should be taken off of yourself and your spouse and redirected, first, to God and what He wants for your marriage—which is passionately chasing after His Word on a continual basis in a genuine manner, together.

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While marriage is capable of love and success without the presence of Christ, placing Christ first holds the power and ability to elevate your relationship to inconceivable heights. In fact, when God is not first in your marriage, your spouse becomes the person you look toward to fulfill the space God should occupy in your heart, and this inevitably leads to frustration and anger because, after all, our partners are not perfect. While your partner may be wonderful in countless ways, he or she is still unable to execute the fullness of God’s plan which is to submit to Christ and live a life for Him and not ourselves. Placing anyone or anything above your spouse may feel strange, in a sense, but God is not just anyone or anything. He gave His life for you so that you may have love and life. Once He becomes first in your heart and life, the order and peace of your home will fall naturally into place.

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word… –Ephesians 5:22-23.

Once He becomes first in your heart and life, the order and peace of your home will fall naturally into place.

Our God is an awesome God because He allows every one of His children the gift of His presence, and that gift is free. All you have to do is believe He is God and seek a close relationship with Him. As you and your spouse pray and study the Word together, you will come to realize that your to-do lists are not remotely as dire, and the precedence of your everyday tasks will not be as pressing as your urge to seek Him, together, establishing and maintaining a strong relationship with Christ. Without Him, we are helpless, no matter how together your life may seem. After all, He is the creator of love and marriage. With Him, however, your marriage will have newfound confidence, trust, love and joy because He knows best for you and your relationship.