Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Confuse Dating for Mating

These days, the purpose of dating is often confused for mating, which poses a big problem in the long-run. Author Michelle McKinney Hammond shows us that dating is actually about collecting data. Trust us, you'll want to hear Michelle's unique take.

 

Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Confuse Dating for Mating

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These days, the purpose of dating is often confused for mating, which poses a big problem in the long-run. Author Michelle McKinney Hammond shows us that dating is actually about collecting data. Trust us, you'll want to hear Michelle's unique take.


“Dating is not for mating, it’s for collecting data,” states Michelle McKinney Hammond. In the modern world of “swipe right” matchmaking, the purpose of dating is sometimes warped. But as best-selling author Michelle McKinney Hammond notes in this video, dating should be where you build a mental database of what you are truly looking for in a partner.

“Now, I always like to think about dating as shopping!” Michelle explains. She encourages us to consider the first date like a trip to a relationship boutique—you get to check out the fit, feel, and fabric of the person with whom you’re going out. It’s a chance to find out how their goals, their tastes and personality mesh with yours.

But before you run out to do some shopping, know this: Just as you don’t always buy something when you go shopping, not every date will result in a match and that’s ok! Be respectful of each other and make sure to protect your heart along the way—“the one” could be waiting just around the corner!

“You better check out that family,” Michelle continues. If you’re dating someone for a longer stretch of time, you’ll get to spend time with their friends and family. Use these times to get some third-party data. You can tell a lot about a person based on who they choose to hang out with as well as their family background. As Michelle says, “Birds of a feather…” so don’t ignore your instincts if you get warning signs from their peers or parents.

It may seem that using dating for data strips all the romance out of the process, but not nearly as much as using it for casual hook-ups. Besides, what’s more romantic than knowing someone, really knowing them because you’ve done your research? Numbers don’t lie, so date your way to figuring out what your perfect ten should be.

Are you using dating for mating? Watch this video to soak in some dating wisdom from Michelle McKinney Hammond.


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